The Price of Freedom

*This is from a class discussion post

Online tradwives are not a new phenomenon. In fact, they derive from a long history of white women upholding white patriarchy through the promotion and adherence to traditional gender roles. While the alt right is characterized by its aggression and "masculine" dominance, women's role in it has been to soften it, make it seem palatable to the masses.

From female slaveowners to the United Daughters of the Confederacy to the Reich Bride Schools, white women have utilized their unique position to perpetuate systems of white supremacy. Their unique position—while limiting due to their gender—still allows them to exercise considerable power as white persons. These movements depend on the presumption that women are inherently softer. This lures people into the ideology, assuming that the presence of women makes these ideologies harmless or even aspirational.

The emergence of tradwives on the internet is ignorant at best, and dangerous at worst. With their pastel dresses, curled hair, and sweet, high-pitched voices, they paint a seemingly innocuous picture. One full of freshly baked bread, lounging at home, and being provided for. But when you look past the veneer of pink, you see a promotion of hate and assimilation. The romanticization of the 1950s not only ignores the misogyny women faced at the time(lobotomies, discouragement from pursuing education, etc.), but also presents a blindingly white utopia. One where Black people, queer people, disabled people, and anyone not "All-American" simply don't exist.

I've come across many online tradwives boasting about the "rules" they have in their marriage. They must stay below a certain weight, they're not allowed to go to the gym, have male friends, or even wear pants. These violations of personhood are framed as a natural element of heterosexual relationships and marriage. Quite dire, if you ask me.

It's reminiscent of the musical Evita. While the titular character (and real-life first lady) were beloved by the citizens of Argentina, her charisma and glamour was a softener for the authoritarian power her husband wielded.

I see a lot of rhetoric from tradwives about "why did women fight to go to work?" or that feminism ruined relationships between men and women. It encourages women to depend completely on their husbands—a very dangerous endeavor. Women have always been part of the workforce and feminism hasn't ruined anything. It's capitalism that creates these draining work lives and prioritizes profit over well-being. It's very easy to dismiss the gains feminism has obtained for women because we were born with them. We didn't have to fight to obtain our own bank accounts, have marital rape recognized, or to have access to birth control. Women's rights are still under attack and we mustn't take them for granted. It is so important (now more than ever) not to be lulled into the false sense of security and simplicity tradwifism offers. 

If we want to build true solidarity and sisterhood, white women must fully relinquish the desire to have the same (or similar) power that white men wield. They must relinquish the desire to subjugate and facilitate acts of violence. We can never dismantle the patriarchy and the other hierarchies it sustains if we continue to uphold it. I mean, the KKK had their hoods sewn by someone.

There must be a decision: power or liberation.

XOXO, Michaela